By using this site, you agree to the Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.
Accept

stmkids.com

  • Lifestyle
    LifestyleShow More
    8 Moving Hacks That Make Packing Up So Much Easier
    29/11/2022
    Summer Dinner Recipes for When It’s Too Hot to Cook
    29/11/2022
    All the Frozen Pastas At Trader Joe’s, Ranked
    27/11/2022
    Easy Dinner Recipes For When You Don’t Want To Cook
    26/11/2022
    How to Decide on a Wedding Budget That Works for You
    25/11/2022
  • Finance
    FinanceShow More
    Productivity Tips for When Summer Is Calling Your Name
    29/11/2022
    How Mindfulness Can Help Level Up Your Finances
    29/11/2022
    Money Questions Newlyweds Should Ask Each Other
    29/11/2022
    Expert Financial Advice Everyone Should Follow
    28/11/2022
    Meet Evernote: Our Best Kept Secret for Staying Ahead of the Workplace
    28/11/2022
  • Sex
    SexShow More
    The Sex Position to Try Based on Your Enneagram
    29/11/2022
    5 Habits That Can Boost Your Sex Life
    29/11/2022
    Why Are Milenials Having Less Sex?
    29/11/2022
    Does Size Really Matter? We’re Breaking It Down
    28/11/2022
    10 Sex Positions To Try When It’s Too Hot To Function
    28/11/2022
  • Sport
    SportShow More
    Why 2022 Should Be the Year You Start Weight Lifting
    29/11/2022
    The Best Fitness Tips From Shay Mitchell’s Trainer
    28/11/2022
    The Workout Motivation Tips Our Editors Swear By
    26/11/2022
    Fitness Tips To Follow if You Hate Working Out
    26/11/2022
    6 Ways to Feel More Toned By Tomorrow
    26/11/2022
  • Tech
    TechShow More
    OnePlus Nord CE 2 review
    28/11/2022
    Nubia Red Magic 7 review
    28/11/2022
    Realme 9 review
    27/11/2022
    Breville Barista Max review
    27/11/2022
    Apple iPhone 13 Mini review
    27/11/2022
  • Contact
  • English
    • Русский
    • Українська
    • Polski
    • Deutsch
Reading: So, You Want to Have a Threesome…
Share
Notification Show More
Latest News
The Sex Position to Try Based on Your Enneagram
Sex
Why 2022 Should Be the Year You Start Weight Lifting
Sport
Productivity Tips for When Summer Is Calling Your Name
Finance
5 Habits That Can Boost Your Sex Life
Sex
8 Moving Hacks That Make Packing Up So Much Easier
Lifestyle
Aa
Aa

stmkids.com

  • Lifestyle
  • Finance
  • Sex
  • Sport
  • Tech
  • Contact
  • English
Search
  • Lifestyle
  • Finance
  • Sex
  • Sport
  • Tech
  • Contact
  • English
    • Русский
    • Українська
    • Polski
    • Deutsch
stmkids.com > Sex > So, You Want to Have a Threesome…
Sex

So, You Want to Have a Threesome…

Alfie Lambert
Last updated: 2022/09/19 at 12:52 PM
Alfie Lambert Published 25/11/2022
Share
SHARE

While there are over 100 episodes of Gossip Girl, there is one that has always stuck out to me: the infamous threesome. Now, there were a lot of things wrong with this particular scene. First of all, for most of us, this was the first thing we saw Hilary Duff in post-Lizzie McGuire. Not exactly Disney Channel material. Second, the three of them went about it all wrong. 

Contents
1. Talk about it2. Be open with your sexuality3. Decide who you want it to be4. Set boundaries5. Focus on communication during6. Discuss it

Not that anyone decided to have a threesome based on Gossip Girl (Dan and Vanessa could never have that kind of influence), but I’m here to tell you everything Dan, Olivia (yes, I had to google to find out her characters name, she was always just Hilary Duff), and Vanessa did wrong — and how they gave threesomes a bad name.

Two GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

We all know the basics of a threesome: three people having sex at once. Easy enough, right? No. There’s so much more that goes into a successful ménage à trois. First of all, it’s not always about two girls worshipping a man at the same time. We’ve all seen the SNL skit — a threesome can also be two males and a female or even three females or three males. 

There is also this misconception that a threesome is every guy’s fantasy and the girlfriends just go along with it, and that’s definitely not the case. Threesomes are exciting and adventurous for both sexes, and it’s often initiated and fantasized by women too. 

So, whether you’re a unicorn (the term given to women who are seeking couples to be the third) or discussing the possibility of a threesome with a partner, you’ve come to the right place. Here is every step you need to take before you and two others get under the sheets.

1. Talk about it

If you’re deciding with your partner to bring in another person, you have a lot to talk about. You need to establish what exactly each of you wants out of the experience. Is it a fantasy that you just want to try once, or are you interested in making it an ongoing thing? How do you want to be involved? How do you want your partner to be involved? Answer each other’s questions openly and honestly. Trust is truly at the foundation of a successful threesome, so you and your partner should be able to talk everything through.

Jealousy is bound to come up during a threesome, and as awkward and mood-killing as it is to talk about it, it is necessary to make a threesome work. You might not know how exactly you’ll feel watching your partner with someone else or being with someone else instead of your partner. Some people will immediately have a negative reaction and want the process to stop; others might be surprised at how much it doesn’t bother them. Neither is right or wrong, and you should discuss with a partner to make sure each of you feels supported regardless of how you react.

This all falls in line much more for people who are a couple, but as a unicorn, it’s also important to be open and honest with yourself. What do you want out of this experience? Understanding your thoughts, ideas, hopes, and (wet) dreams (ha, I couldn’t resist) for a threesome are majorly important for making it be as successful as possible.

2. Be open with your sexuality

Just because you identify as straight doesn’t mean you have to swear yourself away from touching another woman or getting involved in the threesome in that way. Of course, don’t do anything you’re not comfortable doing, but let go of inhibitions and allow yourself to have fun in whatever way feels right to you in the moment. It doesn’t have to make you have an existential crisis about your sexuality either. Sexuality is a spectrum, and it changes throughout our lives.

3. Decide who you want it to be

Now’s the time to pick who you want to have a threesome with. Do you want to recruit a friend? Do you have someone in mind? There are also tons of apps out there. Lots of people find success looking for threesome partners on Tinder, Bumble, Her, and OKCupid, but there are also apps specifically for finding couples or a third, such as Feeld (previously called 3nder — apt!) 

The most important thing about a threesome is that everyone feels comfortable, so don’t feel bad for spending a lot of time deciding on the “who.” A connection is important with one sexual partner, but it’s even bigger when you’re having a threesome. You need to all be on the same page.

4. Set boundaries

This is one of the most important parts of a successful threesome. Decide what you and both of your partners feel comfortable doing. It could be about how and where you touch each other, who initiates, what positions you’re OK with, what you’re comfortable seeing, how you want the three of you to interact — the options are endless. Make sure you include the third person in this conversation too. They’re a person, not a sex toy.

It’s also a good idea to come up with a safe word. Even if you’re practicing BDSM, being able to bow out or stop doing something during a threesome is necessary to make sure everyone is enjoying themselves and connecting with one another.

5. Focus on communication during

We’ve already discussed why it’s so important to communicate before the threesome, but you also want to be talking to each other during as well. Make sure everyone is OK with what’s happening; a threesome is for three people, and making sure no one feels left out or uncomfortable should be the main goal.

6. Discuss it

Afterward, it can be very uncomfortable to initiate a conversation with your partner or the other person about what happened. Make sure to talk, laugh, cuddle, and enjoy your time together. Go out for pizza and talk about movies, or put on a movie and fall asleep. Not talking about it and pretending nothing just happened will just make it all sorts of weird.

Really want to keep the hotness up? Use the experience as dirty talk with your partner in the future. Play to what they said they enjoyed, and you can keep the spark going for weeks. 

Alfie Lambert 25/11/2022
Share this Article
Facebook Twitter Email Print
Share

Editor's Pick

How Your Chronotype Affects Your Productivity
The Lazy Girl’s Guide To Tax Season
5 Habits to Keep You in Shape, According to a Fitness Pro
Money Tips Everyone Should Know, From a Finance Writer
How To Handle the Salary Expectations Question

You Might Also Like

Sex

The Sex Position to Try Based on Your Enneagram

Alfie Lambert Alfie Lambert 29/11/2022
Sex

5 Habits That Can Boost Your Sex Life

Alfie Lambert Alfie Lambert 29/11/2022
Sex

Why Are Milenials Having Less Sex?

Alfie Lambert Alfie Lambert 29/11/2022

Removed from reading list

Undo
Welcome Back!

Sign in to your account

Lost your password?